Monday, October 09, 2006

WTFFDTM, or What The Frickin' Frackin' Does That Mean?

There's something that's been bothering me for quite a while now. More, I daresay than the waning popularity of celebrity poker. In my Internet perusals and the occasional email, I come across acronyms that mystify me.

Hi, Toni. IHHFYIAW. How R U? What's new in ur world? IRAAMND.

And, of course, I'm supposed to just know this translates into:

Hi, Toni. I haven't heard from you in a while. How are you? What's new in your world? I recently acquired a monkey named Deborah.

At the risk of offending millions, is it THAT HARD to spell out words like "are" and "you"? I suppose I should note I'm not talking about text messaging, which involves pecking out correspondence on the cell phone keypad while eating a Frito pie and tailgating me at 70. Clearly, that's a time when linguistic brevity is the only reasonable course of action.

I just missed the boat entirely when it comes to knowledge of all the commonly used shorthand acronyms. I've figured several out from context, of course. It only took a minute or two of pondering to discern IRL means "in real life." At first glance I wondered if "Maybe we can meet IRL someday" suggested a liaison in Ireland.

So in the absence of an authoritative www-shorthand source (and being too lazy to Google it), I've devised my own translations. I like to think they add a certain je nais se qua to the original text.

ROFL. Now I know this denotes laughter. I often see a smiley face next to it. But I cannot figure out what it stands for. ROFL brings to mind the sound one makes while vomiting, which I don't equate with hilarity. But that's just me.

BTDT. I'm clueless. "Beautiful turkeys don't talk." "Beware the dainty trucker."

KWIM. "Kool-Aid works in ministry." "Kan we ingest monkeys?"

MRME. "Methinks randy merriment ensues."

IMHO. "Ima ho." Clearly.

I could go on, but TWJBA. (That would just be annoying.)

-30-

23 comments:

boomama said...

"I recently acquired a monkey named Deborah" made me GUFFAW right here in my living room.

Now that's humor.

Or, as I like to say...

NTH. :-)

Big Mama said...

IMYSM...which is I've missed you so much or I may yak some Monday...I can't really remember.

And can I say that the phrase "when linguistic brevity is the only proper course of action" cracked me up.

Anonymous said...

ROFL - rolling on the floor laughing.

The others I'm clueless on! Funny post! :)

Anonymous said...

HLMH (Here, let me help):

BTDT = Been there, done that
KWIM = Know what I mean
IMHO = In my humble opinion

I got nothing on MRME.

Anonymous said...

Elise, I prefer "Kool-Aid works in ministry" better. I "GUFFAWED" at that one.

Well done, love. You're a funny girl.

PEZmama said...

I am with you on this. I looked up a list of these things somewhere online one time. Out of that entire list, the only one that seemed really necessary was BHAG, which (as if I even have to say this,) stands for "big hairy audacious goal."

;)

Anonymous said...

I was just thinking about this yesterday! I was reading some comments and there was the ever-present "LOL" in a comment or two. And while I've probably "said it" (written it?) myself I have to say it's gotten a little old. It's like when I talk to some of my son's teenage friend-girls and every other word is "like". Like I like to hear like all the like time, like you know? Same thing.

I heard a high school English teacher say that she cannot believe how many papers she receives these days with this lingo laced all through the report--completely by accident. The kids Tex-Mex (as my Mom thinks it's called) and IM each other so often that they don't even realize they are writing this way.

AAR,YCMU. (At any rate, you crack me up. And YES, I DID punctuate that acronym because while I'm all for being hip and happening, I'm also a SFGGN--A Stickler For Good Grammar Nerd.) Thanks for the laugh!

Girl Raised in the South said...

Everything but ROFL was complete mystery to me. Maybe that would be CMTM.....

Tammy said...

I am ROFL here...LOL...
(hey, couldn't resist...and yes, I really was!)

Anonymous said...

Ahh...she's back.... with her sarcasm shining. :) (been missing your writing, friend!) I'm not down with all the letter mumbo-jumbo either. Mostly, though, because it takes me longer to figure out the acronym than to just type out all the words! HAHA
:) Terri

Anonymous said...

Over here from BooMama...love your blog!

Simple Kim said...

You put into words my feelings. The acronyms bug me. I am a grammar nut...I love to read signs and menus and even books and pick out the misspellings and grammar mistakes.

The acronyms are just another reminder that I am aging and 'the in crowd' has left me behind long ago!

Love your posts.

Anonymous said...

Oh my, but you are funny. The only one I don't know is MRME (marry me?), and the recently acquired monkey named Deborah is hysterical.

Anonymous said...

My problem would be storage. Where would these acronyms and what they stand for fit in my brain?

I began to see this in notes left on the floor of my English class. Kids are always looking for a shortcut (as opposed to us adults that enjoy doing things the long, hard way.) Anyway, I watched the phrase "What's up?" morph to "Wassup?" and Finally "Sup?" Over the years. Pretty soon we might be able to write:

Well, GGMCMHJIM (Gotta go my child may have just ingested a monkey)

Linda said...

This is great!! I haven't got a clue either. I'm busy trying to use words and get the spelling correct so my brain won't atrophe altogether. If I start using letters I'll be in real trouble.

Nancy Murphree Davis said...

My husband sent me an email this week that said only, "Tnx." I made him realize that he does this too. He had the nerve to say that he doesn't use that many acronyms. I challenged him on it....he's in the Air Force. They may not WRITE that many, but they talk them all day.

Sarah said...

SO glad you're back! (No, I absolutely refuse to write an acronym for that!)

But I do think you've started a blogging fad of creating new ones--and since nobody knows what half of the "real" ones mean, anyway, why not?

Oh, I love your blog:)

Anonymous said...

I've missed you ! Glad that U R back . :) I'm not computer savvy and the whole acronym thing is WOMH (way over my head .) Could someone just tell me what LOL means? I get it from the context, I think ...

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Found you through Big Mama. You are fun-nee. Glad to know I'm not the only one guessing on these acronyms. But I have to say, Phyllis' mom's Tex-Mex for text messaging is a keeper! I'll be spreading that one around!

Anonymous said...

My 8 yr old dd (dear daughter) just ran downstairs, clapped her hands over my mouth, and told me to "Breathe in, Mom!"

In reference to me uncontrollably rotflmbo....how, may a mother of years ask, is one to "breathe in" whilst one has 8 yr old fingernails grinding into one's flesh in the vicinity of one's mouth?

Of course, the pain DID help me stop giggling...eventually.

Joan said...

I needed a good laugh today. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

oh my goodness, you're FUNNY. I'm bookmarking your blog.

LOL - laughing out loud

Revka said...

I was laughing hard - thanks. And I'm pretty lost when it comes to the acronyms, too.